


dots & lines

by bwoozi



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-29
Updated: 2017-01-29
Packaged: 2018-09-20 15:06:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9497570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bwoozi/pseuds/bwoozi
Summary: Wonwoo just wishes someone had told him how easy it is to fall in love with someone, especially when that person is Kwon Soonyoung.





	

**Author's Note:**

> hello! i'm here with more soonwoo because what else do i write? i've had so many ideas since being in the @soonwoonet group chat... i seriously probably wouldn't write fic at all anymore if it weren't for the support i have there. you guys are the best and i love you all so much <3 big props to sandy (ebulience on ao3) for helping me out... it was with a scene that didn't even make the fic but STILL she helped me with brainstorming and that was so sweet of her~
> 
> this fic is titled after [dots & lines](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-ZblKY48w4&spfreload=1) by lupe fiasco, which is a phenomenal song! i HIGHLY recommend you give it a listen! i discovered it through my friend kip after they linked a playlist of theirs in our group chat. kip if you're reading this i love you and thank u for having excellent taste to inspire my soonwoo bs <3
> 
> the different parts of this fic are numbered in chronological order, but it is intentionally nonlinear. the second part, lines, will be linear because i'm fucking clever. imagine the salt guy meme RIGHT HERE
> 
> this fic has given me SUCH a hard time so please be gentle!!! i hope you enjoy it!

_five; problems_

There were a few problems, Wonwoo thinks. There _are_ a few problems. Soonyoung leans over the edge of the sidewalk and throws up violently.

So maybe there are a lot of problems. 

“You alright, man?” Wonwoo asks, a firm hand on Soonyoung’s back. Soonyoung drags his sleeve across his mouth, taking another swig of shitty beer and glancing back at the pile of vomit in the grass behind him. Wonwoo should have expected this. Soonyoung’s grad party was bound to be wild, he planned it to be the last out of their friends for a reason.

“I should be asking you that, shouldn’t I? Fuck. You know I can’t hold my alo—alcohol, it’s no biggie.” He’s slurring.

Wonwoo laughs. “I’ll be fine.”

“Dude,” Soonyoung starts, “will you really? You _loved_ Eunwoo, man. You were soulmates.”

There’s the first problem, if you don’t count Soonyoung throwing up as the first. Eunwoo is a junior, a junior who went out with Wonwoo because he’s handsome and polite and not because she actually cared about him—she didn’t know him like his friends did, doesn’t know him like Soonyoung does. So he breaks up with her over text a week before he’s due to leave and somehow convinces himself he’s not an asshole.

“Eunwoo said that, not me.” Wonwoo did like her, he thinks absentmindedly. She was a good friend. He wished he had gotten to know her better. “Soon-ah, we should go back home.”

Soonyoung whines, nearly falling on a crack in the sidewalk. “I don’t want to.”

“You won’t have to in what, a week? C’mon.” Wonwoo isn’t much better off, mobility concerned, but he’s at least sort of in his right mind. He takes Soonyoung by the arm and drags him back to his house—it’s a mess inside, but neither of them can be bothered to clean it up. Soonyoung stumbles to his bedroom and collapses on his stomach before Wonwoo turns him on his side, taking his shoes off for him and tossing them aside.

“Come cuddle with me? Please?” He pleads from his mattress, “I’ll be ten times nicer than Eunwoo. I’ll rub your back for you.”

There’s the second problem. Soonyoung is a clingy drunk and he’s been drunk every time Wonwoo has seen him for the past 3 weeks, in the proper spirit of grad party season. The third problem also has to do with grad party season—almost every conversation they’ve had recently has ended with one of them saying “I’ll miss you so much,” or “you have to call me every day, okay?” Their colleges might not be that far, but it’s further than they're used to. It’ll take years of self-reflection for Wonwoo to realize that he’d fallen in love with Soonyoung in high school, slowly and tortuously, but for now, he chalks up his collision with the mattress half on top of Soonyoung to exhaustion. Soonyoung does rub his back, but it’s the next morning, paired with a groan of hunger in Wonwoo’s ear.

Over breakfast, which is a very sophisticated bowl of Fruit Loops, Soonyoung suggests that they should make a pact. Wonwoo scoffs. Soonyoung might be sober, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t completely ridiculous as usual.

“What kind of pact?” Wonwoo asks, watching Soonyoung down five Advil with the last of his milk. It’s almost impressive.

Soonyoung points a finger at Wonwoo, his hand bobbing slightly while he talks. “If we’re both still single by thirty, we get married. Dating is hard when you’re old—plus, like, tax benefits, or whatever.” So what Soonyoung’s saying is he’s afraid of being alone. Wonwoo doesn’t blame him, but this happens to be the fourth and most convoluted problem.

“How serious are you?” This is a pointless question. Soonyoung is always serious when he’s making outlandish suggestions.

“Completely serious. You’re my favorite person, so I’m in it for the long haul anyways.”

There’s only a bit more teasing and a bit more discourse before Soonyoung pulls out two pieces of notebook paper, focusing intensely on writing a coherent contract which they both sign. It’s not legally bound, obviously, but Wonwoo knows the second he touches his pen to the paper that he’ll regret this his entire life, or at least a significant part of it.

 

                _six; in vain_

It doesn’t take much to break Soonyoung down, really, in the grand scheme of things. He gets cocky easily, but at his core, he’s a frustrated extrovert, too concerned with how he presents himself. Wonwoo knew that would sabotage him when he went to college. He’s in this dance group, all kids from his college, held at a nearby dance studio—it’s torture, he tells Wonwoo over the phone. They all know each other, so he’s anxious, going stiff and pursing his lips while he tries to follow the directions of his groupmates. Wonwoo is surprised to hear that Soonyoung, of all people, feels like an outcast. He assumes that things will get better with time, that by the end of the semester he’ll feel a bit better, but he stops talking to Wonwoo altogether right before break starts. The only response Wonwoo gets is a short affirmation when he suggested that they take the train home together. He’s a bit worried when he meets up with Soonyoung on his college’s campus.

Soonyoung leads him up to his dorm silently, immediately pacing the most he can in the small space. Wonwoo settles onto Soonyoung’s bed with his legs crossed and watches him. He better not cry. Wonwoo isn’t ready to deal with that.

“Your roommate coming back anytime soon?” Wonwoo asks in conversation. Soonyoung practically whimpers.

“No. His girlfriend lives on the floor below us, so he stays with her and her roommate all the time—he doesn’t even keep his stuff here. Because, like, it’s not like anyone’s checking. I’m alone, always.”

“Oh.” Wonwoo gulps. “It’s not that bad, Soon-ah, at least you don’t have to deal with—”

"Everything is bad, Wonwoo-yah, I failed all my classes—”

“Oh my God, all of them?” Wonwoo’s awful for not knowing anything was seriously wrong, isn’t he?

Soonyoung nods with a painful sounding sniffle. “I just wanted to do shit that means something to me, you know? I want to make friends and be happy, I try and it doesn’t work, so nothing—nothing else does…” Wonwoo jinxed it, Soonyoung’s crying. Hard. His knees give out and he curls up beside Wonwoo’s legs on his bed. Wonwoo doesn’t know what else to do but awkwardly lie beside him, pushing overgrown hair out of his eyes and shushing him, telling him it’s just the first semester. Soonyoung shakes his head violently, harsh sobs making it sound like his chest is caving in. Wonwoo was looking forward to Soonyoung’s accompaniment on the train home beforehand, but he’s a bit sick to his stomach having to hear Soonyoung sniffle and rub his swollen eyes roughly the whole trip.

Wonwoo feels bad about how busy he is over that winter break. He had family over, so during the day, he was stuck at home. The last thing he wanted was for Soonyoung to feel alone, though, so each night after the house goes quiet, he ducks out and lets himself into Soonyoung’s house, usually ending up flush against him and feeling his chest rise and fall with each breath. Soonyoung was always already in bed by the time Wonwoo got there, which makes sense considering how late he tended to arrive, but Wonwoo sometimes wonders if he got out of bed in the first place.

That break in particular seems to last forever, long nights spent holding Soonyoung to sleep through tears and not mentioning it the next morning. He says he wants to drop out—Wonwoo thinks that’s a bit drastic, but then again, his own first semester went off without a hitch. Between in depth conversations and long video calls, Wonwoo knows Soonyoung’s break lasts one day longer than his, even knows the train he’s taking, so he calls him an hour before it leaves.

“How’d you sleep?” Wonwoo asks gently after a short, quiet “hey” from both parties. Soonyoung laughs or maybe sighs.

“Not well, honestly. I had to settle for squeezing the life out of a pillow.”

Wonwoo smiles. “You don’t spoon me _that_ aggressively.” He tucks his phone between his cheek and shoulder, stirring a watery cup of instant coffee placed neatly next to his notebook. “Actually, you don’t spoon me at all; you always want to be the little spoon.”

“Not true. Change of subject.” Soonyoung laughs, like it’s scandalous.

“You nervous?” Wonwoo asks tentatively. He says it as if Soonyoung has already decided to go back.

Wonwoo can’t see him, but Soonyoung is standing at his doorway, suitcase mocking him from the floor by his shoes. He wants to just pick it up and leave, have faith in the second semester and every semester after it being better, but it’s unexpectedly difficult, like he has weights tied to his ankles.

“Yeah,” he admits, “I just, like. I don’t know.” He’s squatting now, toying with the handle of his luggage. He thinks about taking his shoes off and going back to bed before Wonwoo clears his throat and sips coffee into the phone, voice dripping with the reassurance that Soonyoung needs.

“You’ll miss your train.” He says.

Soonyoung doesn’t miss his train. He’s never been more timely, actually, with the notion that things will fall into place so long as Wonwoo believes they will.

 

                _two; one thing_

“You think Eunwoo even noticed I left?” Wonwoo talks like he’s worried but he’s already untying his bowtie, a soft lilac color that Eunwoo insisted on. It doesn’t suit him at all. He’s much more like himself after unbuttoning his tuxedo jacket and the top few buttons of his dress shirt, pulling his glasses from his breast pocket and sliding them on with a few rapid blinks. Soonyoung thinks about whispering “four eyes” like usual, but ignores the urge after Wonwoo stops him from crossing the street without looking both ways.

Ironically, they jaywalk anyway. Soonyoung finishes his half-jog towards the other side of the road with a short “I doubt it” in Wonwoo’s direction.

“What’s our excuse if she did?”

“That you’re hanging out with your best friend, Kwon Soonyoung.” He shoots Wonwoo this smug smile, the same one he has when he’s gassing himself up around his friends. It’s stupid but endearing.

“That’s not a good excuse, Soon-ah.” Wonwoo catches him smile at the sidewalk when they walk under a street lamp.

“Bros over hoes.”

Wonwoo punches Soonyoung in the arm. “Eunwoo’s not a hoe—she’s the only underclassman I can tolerate.”

“Tolerate? You _tolerate_ your girlfriend?”

“Yeah, unfortunately. She’s cool, but.” He punctuates with a shrug.

“Unfortunately,” Soonyoung echoes with a chuckle, then adds, “you should break up with her.”

“Not tonight. It’s prom night, that would be shitty of me.” As if leaving wasn’t shitty enough, he thinks. They’re close to the football field now, Soonyoung tugging off his tuxedo jacket unceremoniously as they walk. He’s sweating in proper Soonyoung fashion, even though it’s not too hot or too cold outside—it must’ve been the dancing. Wonwoo regrets not being able to see it while he was busy with Eunwoo and her friends.

Soonyoung holds Wonwoo’s shoulder to stop him, briefly, ducking and reaching into a bush lining the back of the bleachers. He beams up at Wonwoo and yanks a small bottle of booze from it, like magic, springing up to his feet excitedly. He holds it in both hands like a treasure—Wonwoo would be lying if he said he wasn’t amused.

“I stashed this here for this occasion.”

“You planned to ditch prom halfway through?”

“Obviously. I didn’t exactly plan on ditching with you, I kinda thought Eunwoo would convince you to stay, but I’m not complaining.”

“Why here?”

“I found out the other day that they don’t actually lock the back gate to the football field.”

“I would’ve expected you to be more invested in your prom experience.” It’s no secret that Soonyoung is a popular guy—he really had no reason to leave in the first place.

“Yeah?” Soonyoung smirks, unscrewing the cap on the bottle of booze and taking an experimental swig. He cringes. “I don’t know, stuff like that won’t matter to me when I’m married with kids, you know?”

“And this will?” Wonwoo teases. Soonyoung yanks the gate open and whips his head back at Wonwoo, beaming at him.

“Of course,” He insists. He kicks up dirt when he bolts towards the middle of the field, dropping his tuxedo jacket and extending his arms, whiskey sloshing violently in its bottle. It’ll be a long night.

 

                _seven; betrothed_

Wonwoo loves Soonyoung at certain points in time throughout college rather than consistently. He’ll date someone and think it’s right, that it’ll work out, but then he has to break it off because it isn’t and it won’t—right after those moments is when he loves Soonyoung, when he calls him and asks if he just has bad luck or if he’s genuinely a bad person. Soonyoung says it’s bad luck. Wonwoo sometimes chalks up the self-sabotage to the fact that every person he dates just gets closer and closer to being Soonyoung. As quickly as he dismisses it, he’s right. He just hasn’t reached the conclusion that none of them will ever be Soonyoung.

So, he unconsciously keeps trying to find Soonyoung in other people. This time around, it’s Sooyoung, who is one letter away from him literally and so far from him in every other sense. It lasts a solid half a year before something in Wonwoo’s heart shrivels up and he feels guilty, breaking it off. Because you know, finals are soon, not because he accidentally called her Soonyoung while they were making out. She didn’t even notice, which probably makes it worse. Wonwoo will keep denying it through it all.

“You should come over this weekend.” Soonyoung suggests over facetime, the day after Sooyoung takes the last of her stuff she left in Wonwoo’s dorm. Wonwoo half-smiles, camera titled so that Soonyoung can only see his top lip.

“Sounds like a plan, Stan.”

“Stan?” Soonyoung’s eyebrows furrow before he grins widely. “Oh. God, you’re an idiot.”

“Calling me names? In a time like this?”

“I’m a little sorry,” He says, “you were going on a year, yeah? Jeez.”

“A bit over.”

Soonyoung frowns. “You need to talk about it?”

“No. I honestly just want to, like, go get a burger and take a nap. Then I’ll be good.”

“Fuck, I’ve been craving burgers.” Soonyoung says over facetime, then in front of his burger that Saturday, audibly swallowing his drool while he picks up the greasy thing. They really don’t skimp on the meat at this place—the patty is huge. Or maybe Soonyoung just has small hands.

Wonwoo got so sick of dates. He always had to be at least a little presentable when he went out with Sooyoung, at least put on joggers. Today, though, he walked into the diner clad in basketball shorts and slippers, hair damp from showering after a long three days without doing so, and Soonyoung still smiled at him. To be fair, he was similarly disheveled, but that somehow makes Wonwoo more contented.

Soonyoung realizes halfway through his burger that he wants to talk to Wonwoo as much as he wants to eat. He wipes his mouth on a napkin, speaking around half-chewed food. “Nap after this?”

“Sounds like a Stan, plan.” Soonyoung snorts at that. “I mean, fuck…”

“Oh!” Soonyoung practically drops his burger, pointing at Wonwoo with purpose before swallowing. “I forgot, I have good news! I wanted to tell you in person.”

“What’s up?”

“The leader of the dance team… he asked me to choreograph something and teach it to everyone. He said if it’s good, we can perform it at the competition in the summer. I think they like me.” Soonyoung is so adorably giddy, his eyes closing in a broad smile. Wonwoo isn’t incapable of being genuinely happy for other people, he just doesn’t feel that way very often—with Soonyoung, though, it comes easily.

“Really?” Wonwoo sips his cola with widened eyes. “God, I remember when you cried yourself to sleep in my ear because you thought they hated you.”

Soonyoung shoves a few fries in his mouth with a grimace. “You suck for bringing that up.”

“You’ve come a long way, that’s all I’m saying.”

“About Sooyoung, though…” Soonyoung starts. Wonwoo glares at him, which Soonyoung diffuses with an apologetic look. “Okay, maybe not about Sooyoung. Just in general, you have the pact to fall back on.”

Wonwoo laughs. “How many years on that? Nine?”

“Yeah, think so.”

“Let’s just get married now.” Wonwoo jokes.

“Where’s my ring, hm?” Soonyoung retorts. Wonwoo holds up one of his onion rings, making Soonyoung slap the table with a loud howl of laughter. Wonwoo finds himself laughing, too, a sound that mingles with the rest of the sounds and voices in the diner.

The thing is, Wonwoo is the type of person who doesn’t know how other people’s feelings work, while Soonyoung can’t seem to figure out his own. Wonwoo’s denial is all in himself, but Soonyoung’s doubts lie in the impressions of other people. It’s quite the situation, if you could call it that. Anything that happens between them happens beneath the surface. They appreciate the stillness of their metaphorical body of water too much to even think about stirring up muck or making unnecessary waves.

(If Wonwoo could accredit one thing to the stress of finals, it could certainly be the dream he has during his nap that evening. He drowned. Almost drowned, actually—Soonyoung had pulled him to the surface.)

 

 **** _four; yearbooks_

_Jeon Wonwoo!!!_

_WE MADE IT!!!!!!!!!!! Fuck high school! Kidding. You made it bearable~~~ (I’m taking up this whole page, you can yell at me later)_

_You’re the best person I know. You deserve so much, I’m so happy you got accepted into your dream college!!! I just hope you end up writing for something fun instead of something business-y, I really don’t want to have to see you in a monkey suit all the time when we’re older._

_This sounds awful and cheesy, but I hope we’re together until we’re cranky little old men. Like, I hope we’re in the same nursing home and I get to flush the toilet while you’re showering. ~~Or while the nurse is sponging you down, or whatever. Do you think plumbing will be improved at all by then? Like if I flush the toilet the shower won’t get cold?~~  I’m getting sidetracked, sorry. I’m not as good at saying things as you are. Just know that I’m very happy and very proud of us, and that I hope college is good to us~ I hope we never fall out of contact, seriously. I love you~ (ew) _

_Here’s my autograph, in case I ever get famous~ Not that it’ll be THAT valuable, since I’ll make time for you even if I am famous, so you can have as many autographs as you want!_

_LOVE_ _♡,_

_KWON SOONYOUNG_

                                _Kwon Soonyoung,_

_Isn’t it funny that I was annoyed by you when we first met? It really never changed, I just appreciate your nonsense now. I’m looking forward to putting up with your shit in college too, it’s been fun. I think I’d be a pretty boring person without you._

_I’ll remember so much of the shit we’ve done together for the rest of my life. I wonder if that’s a good thing or a bad thing? How many unexcused absences of mine are you responsible for, again? I’d say all of them. But they were worth it, probably._

_I don’t want to make this sound like a goodbye or anything, but it is the end of an era. So goodbye to high school, I guess! I have no doubt we’ll still be close in college, mostly because I don’t expect to find many more people who appreciate my humor. It’s not often a guy like Jeon Wonwoo runs into his foil. I’m grateful that it’s you (I’m cringing) and I’m so proud of you (cringing still) and I love you (BIG cringe here, my fingers are curling)_

_Thanks for everything, Soonyoung. Here’s to more fucking around and being obnoxious together!_

_Sincerely,_

_Jeon Wonwoo_

 

_eight; withheld_

Soonyoung is ecstatic that he was able to find an apartment before graduating, though he doesn’t spend a lot of time in it. It’s close to campus and he lives with Wonwoo, whose own campus is quite a way’s away, but he says he doesn’t mind. He insists it’s a small price to pay to live with someone he gets along with so well.

Wonwoo and Soonyoung might share a dinky apartment, but they practically live in Wonwoo’s car—it’s a mom car, not a van, but close, the kind of car with a squared-off back. It’s littered with empty fast food bags and stray articles of clothing, which makes Soonyoung wonder if he’s a real adult with a real job. He’s fortunate to have been offered a position teaching at his dance studio after his internship junior year. Fortunate, but still prone to going on long, solemn drives with Wonwoo late at night. They’ve always been fans of doing things just because they can. Soonyoung knew the first night of spring break would be one of those nights, given the recent situation with Mingyu.

Soonyoung clears his throat following the click of his seatbelt and the revving of the engine. “I know that, like, I’m the emotional one, but if you’re upset, you can tell me. You should tell me. Please. I’m worried about you.”

Mingyu’s closer to Soonyoung than Eunwoo and Sooyoung were, anatomy considered. Maybe some parts of his personality reminded Wonwoo of Soonyoung, but none of them were quite right—he’s immature in a way that isn’t entertaining, grossly needy, but still feeling somewhat untouchable at all times. Mingyu doesn’t know Wonwoo like Soonyoung does—he thinks he’s a robot, that he can’t feel anything, while Soonyoung knows he does for the right people. It was inevitable that Mingyu would stop being able to put up with it. He just lost patience at a very inconvenient time, is all. He decided it was best that Wonwoo and Soonyoung don’t come to Japan with him and his friends just a few weeks before they were due to leave.

“I’m really not upset, Soon-ah, but thank you.” Soonyoung wishes Wonwoo didn’t have such a nice side profile—how is it possible to look so handsome while driving?

Soonyoung rests his feet on the dashboard. “That’s so crazy. I’m upset and I wasn’t even dating Mingyu. That wasn’t even my trip to go on.” Wonwoo is chewing at his lip. “You’re sure you’re okay?”

“I mean, I still want to go to Japan. Mingyu at least broke it off before we bought plane tickets, so it’s no biggie, I’ll just put everything back in my savings and go another time.” The bulk of his disappointment comes from the fact that he knew Soonyoung wanted to go, see the cherry blossoms and all. He would’ve been so cute with petals in his hair.

Soonyoung sighs, raising an eyebrow at Wonwoo’s collected tone. “It’s spring break, senior year of college, your boyfriend just dumped you, and you’re alright with staying at home with me for two weeks.”

“I am.”

“You’re something else.” He says with a helpless giggle.

Wonwoo shrugs then, turning onto the highway. “I like to relax.”

Soonyoung laughs fondly. “That’s why I need you.”

At this point, Wonwoo knew. He decided that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Soonyoung long before Mingyu broke up with him. He’d subconsciously elected to wait until he was thirty and hope Soonyoung would stay single.

Problems. There are problems again. Wonwoo is so disillusioned to what love is supposed to feel like that he can’t tell if he’s in love with Soonyoung. It often seems like it, when he feels like talking himself to sleep and ends up in Soonyoung’s bed, pulling him close in the blue light of morning. It’s even worse when Soonyoung wakes up early and brings coffee to his room. Wonwoo feels himself blush, sometimes, which is ridiculous. When has a boyfriend or girlfriend of his ever made him blush?

“Where are we going?” Soonyoung asks over the near silent hum of the radio.

Wonwoo clicks his tongue. “What’s past the next exit?”

“Some metro park, a Taco Bell, two hotels, a steakhouse…”

“Taco Bell on the beach?” He suggests flatly. Soonyoung’s holler makes him smile and his hysterical nodding brings a laugh out of him.

“Kim Mingyu is missing out, you know that?”

The tacos get cold by the time they get to the beach and they missed the sunset by a longshot, but it’s not quite nighttime, so Wonwoo gets a chance to admire the image of Soonyoung with taco sauce all over his face and shredded, bright orange cheese in the grass around him. He munches on cinnamon twists while they approach the water and sink their toes into the wet sand, cool water licking the soles of their feet. Soonyoung shivers in a way that makes Wonwoo want to sling an arm around him.

It’s almost 2am when Wonwoo asks Soonyoung why he doesn’t date and almost 2:30 when Soonyoung stops avoiding the question and just admits that he hasn’t found anyone he likes yet. Wonwoo’s too clueless to realize that Soonyoung desperately wants to convey that he has, and that it’s him—maybe a part of Wonwoo knows, too, but that doesn’t keep him from staying quiet despite his burning desire to confess to Soonyoung, or at least say something of that nature.

They dodge the waves when they come up shore. That’s how it’s always been, even if it’s too dark to see anything but the moonlight’s reflection over them.

 

                _three; after another_

“I feel stupid.” Soonyoung confesses, his eyes locked on the night sky. Wonwoo’s belly is warm and his breath smells like whiskey, which is really not his (or Soonyoung’s) drink of choice. It doesn’t matter, given the circumstances. There’s a magical feeling that comes with something like this—lying in the middle of their high school’s football field and having it all to themselves, thrumming bass audible from across the street. In the midst of passing the bottle between the two of them, they find that being inebriated adds to it, oddly enough.

“Why?” Wonwoo can hardly see Soonyoung, but his cheeks are shiny with sweat, stupid bleach blond hair falling into the fake grass below him.

“Because, like. I’m a big fuckin’ sap and want to wait until I actually, really trust someone before I’m in a relationship. I’m a weenie.”

Wonwoo laughs. “You’re not a weenie.” He really isn’t. He’s smarter than Wonwoo in that sense.

“I am. I’ve never even kissed anyone.”

Wonwoo shoots him an incredulous look. “That’s a lie.”

“It isn’t! I’ve, like, pecked girls on the lips, but… I don’t know. Never really had anyone else’s tongue in my mouth.” Soonyoung scrunches his face in an unreadable sort of grimace. Wonwoo’s fingers brush his forearm, poking at the cuff of his shirt idly. He has an idea—Soonyoung can tell, with the way he giggles dumbly to himself. His head finally lolls to his side.

Soonyoung is immediately met with an intense gaze and a hushed “You should let me put my tongue in your mouth.”

“What?” He says, long after he’s had time to process. Wonwoo just smiles at him—who let him have hard liquor, again?

“You should kiss me.”

Soonyoung ponders that, brow furrowing before sitting up to down the rest of the whiskey in one go, a sputtering cough following the sound of the bottle sliding across turf. He straddles Wonwoo, then, licking his lips in anticipation. Soonyoung’s got this awful, romantic look in his eyes, only slightly glazed over from intoxication—it makes Wonwoo shiver paired with the placement of Soonyoung’s hands on his shoulders.

“I think I might’ve always wanted to do this,” He murmurs, mostly to himself, before hiccupping and bending down to catch his lips in a sloppy kiss.

He’s too excited, or maybe nervous, so Wonwoo places a steady hand on the small of his back, rubbing small circles into it. Soonyoung sighs when Wonwoo moves it up his spine, eventually resting in his hair—that’s when he slows down, and God, is it slow. Wonwoo doesn’t know if it’s the whiskey or something else, but Soonyoung is kissing him like he’s in love, like he wants it to last forever.

(And Soonyoung very well might’ve been—in love, that is. He hadn’t thought about it previously and certainly wasn’t in the place to at the given moment, held tightly in Wonwoo’s arms, lips melding with his over and over again. He knows that he wants it to last forever, though, each time Wonwoo’s tongue slides across his bottom lip, his chest pressing impossibly closer to Soonyoung’s.)

Soonyoung shouldn’t be so good at this, but he is. Wonwoo really isn’t as drunk as Soonyoung thinks he is, even with his shirt half untucked and his glasses pushed up his face to rest on his forehead. Either way, it doesn’t matter. Suddenly, nothing matters, which is weird for both of them. There’s a lot of things that matter when you’re a self-absorbed high schooler. In this moment, it’s just the insistence of Soonyoung’s tongue pushing past Wonwoo’s lips, though. That’s all there is and all there needs to be.

Wonwoo tries to prop himself up on his elbows better. This wasn’t his best decision—the movement makes Soonyoung whimper and Wonwoo can feel something pressing at the front of his pants. Wonwoo isn’t as affected, though he was probably on his way there. He’s proud of himself in the moment, but also at a loss of what to do, so he snickers into the side of Soonyoung’s mouth.

“Don’t.” Soonyoung begs, his flustered smile making it impossible to continue. Wonwoo’s nose is scrunched halfway up to his eyes. “Don’t you dare. Say a word and you’re dead, Wonwoo-yah.”

There’s a soft, pudgy hand on Wonwoo’s mouth, which he laughs heartily into, though admittedly not for long. Soonyoung climbs off of him and lies at his side again, covering his face in shame.

“I told you I’m a weenie.”

“It’s cool, I like weenies.” They’re good kissers, apparently.

“Are you coming out to me?” Soonyoung jokes, nudging Wonwoo with his ankle. Wonwoo laughs.

“What use is coming out when we literally just—”

“Shh,” Soonyoung contradicts himself by wiggling closer to Wonwoo on the field, head resting heavily on his chest. He deliberately keeps his crotch away from Wonwoo’s side, which Wonwoo is thankful for. “Let’s not talk about that. I’m going to sleep.”

“You can’t sleep in the fucking football field, Soon-ah.”

“Who says?”

“I says,” Wonwoo sighs, reluctantly wrapping an arm around Soonyoung anyway. He pulls his phone from his breast pocket nonchalantly to see a whopping twelve text and three missed calls from Eunwoo. Soonyoung extends a finger to expand one of the notifications, cringing at the content before letting his hand drop back onto Wonwoo’s chest. “And I have to go back, you know. Eunwoo’s pissed.”

“I know. Just give me five minutes.”

Wonwoo gives him five minutes. He knows Soonyoung won’t make it past the teachers as he is—it’s not even that he had that much to drink, he’s just so obvious about it. Wonwoo might have to leave him behind. Or, they’ll dance around things as usual, as with everything they do. He can’t be with Soonyoung without feeling like he’s running away from something, and though he resents that, he can’t imagine how he could ever run away from him. Even when Soonyoung holds his hand on his way back to the rear gate of the field, rambling on about the prom they missed, Wonwoo feels no need to leave. Even when Soonyoung tugs on his wrist, turning him around and staring at his lips before he opens the gate.

“Before you go,” He murmurs, hands now placed firmly on Wonwoo’s shoulders, “kiss me one more time?”

It’s both of their faults for not realizing sooner, or maybe Wonwoo’s fault for complying then.

 

                _nine; fine print_

The pact is singlehandedly the worst thing Wonwoo has ever had to put up with.

He can do a shitty, minimum wage job on top of an unpaid internship—that feels like it has more guaranteed fulfillment backing it up, whereas marrying Soonyoung is something he’s wanted in his future longer than he’s wanted a stable job. He can admit that to himself now, which makes things complicated. He really, really wants to tell Soonyoung everything. Part of him knows that Soonyoung feels the same way, but he can never know if Soonyoung would fess up to it. Waiting until he’s thirty just seems like the safer option. If, by thirty, Soonyoung really isn’t into the idea of getting married, he’ll run away from it in proper Soonyoung fashion.

At the end of the day, though, everyone reaches a breaking point. It’s difficult to keep your mouth shut about being in love with Kwon Soonyoung when you live with him and are constantly endeared by him. He comes home from dance practice late at night—shiny with sweat, looking satisfied—and Wonwoo practically tackles him, holding him close and sighing. It could be awkward if Soonyoung wasn’t giggling softly and leaning closer to him, balancing his weight between his two feet.

“Did you miss me?” He teases, dropping a plastic bag to the floor and wrapping his arms tightly around his waist. “What’s up?”

“Nothing,” Wonwoo’s close to suffocating him. In other words, something is up.

“You can tell me.”

“I love you.” It’s mumbled into Soonyoung’s shoulder, so quiet that he can hardly hear it, and punctuated with an even tighter squeeze on Wonwoo’s end. Soonyoung laughs, freeing his arms from Wonwoo’s grasp and tangling them in his hair.

He says “Love you too, Wonwoo-yah,” but what he really wanted to say was he’s known, or at least that he’s hoped for this. Soonyoung’s cheeks bunch up and he blushes, hiding it in the crook of Wonwoo’s neck as if he’d be able to see it in first place.

Soonyoung feels Wonwoo swallow. “No, I mean I—”

“I know what you mean. I’m saying I love you too.”

Wonwoo was really anticipating Soonyoung to pull away, dismiss it by calling him weird, but he doesn’t, so he really doesn’t know what else to do but cry, and he never cries. He’s a quiet crier, always, like the way you cry when you watch a sad movie—Soonyoung would be able to tell if he stepped back at all, so Wonwoo grabs the back of his shirt and rubs his face into the collar of it.

“Since when?” He asks after a bout of silence, swaying slightly back and forth.

“Since always,” Soonyoung whispers, “since before we decided to get married at thirty, I think.”

“Me too.”

They stand in the doorway for so long that Wonwoo can’t recall if he even gave Soonyoung the chance to close the door and take his shoes off.

“What do we do now?” Wonwoo laughs, loosening his grip slightly.

Soonyoung looks down at the bag he set down earlier. “Sit down? Eat these chips I bought?”

“That’s it?”

“Yeah. What else?”

What else, indeed. They sit on the couch in front of some rerun of a drama they’ve already seen, volume lowered to the point that they can hear their own breaths between their crunching. They don’t speak for a while, but Soonyoung tosses his legs over Wonwoo’s, enjoying the subtle skinship. It’s strange. He could kiss him, because god knows they both want it, but their relationship has never been like that save for one particularly bizarre occurrence, so they stay put. Wonwoo eventually sighs with laughter, loosely wrapping his arms around one of Soonyoung’s legs.

“I’m mad that that was so easy.” Easy, but his eyes are still a bit watery.

Soonyoung shoves a sizable handful of chips into his mouth. “I’m mad that you confessed first.”

“Listen,” He starts, “I wasted so much time, though. Like, so much time.”

“What do you mean?”

“Like, what was the point of dating all those people and trying to find things I liked about them when I was basing all those things off of you?” Wonwoo hides his face in his greasy hands. “That was sappy, I’m sorry.”

“You’re fine,” Soonyoung giggles, “but I get that.”

“I was really gonna wait until we turned 30.” Soonyoung smiles at that, putting the chips aside and wiping his fingers on his jeans.

“Yeah, I was too.” Soonyoung looks at him, then, his eyes soft. “Can you come closer?”

Wonwoo stays huddled into his chest through the night, Soonyoung planting kisses on the top of his head and mumbling long repressed confessions into his hair.

 

                _one; unconditional_

With the semester change in his junior year, Wonwoo no longer has any classes with Soonyoung. It’s not a big deal considering all the time they spend with each other outside of school, but the days suddenly seem longer, classes dragging on and on and feeling like they last for days. There’s one day that Wonwoo blanks out for an entire psychology lecture, wishing that the day would just be over—he manages to sneakily send a frowny face text to Soonyoung, and Soonyoung apparently manages to get out of class and pop his head into the psychology classroom.

“The counselor told me she needs to see Wonwoo, if he could come down.” He says seriously.

“When?” Wonwoo’s psychology teacher calls from her desk, not catching the smile Soonyoung shoots him.

“As soon as possible, she says.” Wonwoo reluctantly rises from his seat. “Bring your stuff.” Soonyoung adds.

Wonwoo is quiet until the door is closed behind them, walking side by side down the middle of the empty hallway. “What does she need to see me for?”

Soonyoung laughs. “What would the counselor want to see you for, Mr. Summa Cum Laude?”

Wonwoo glares at Soonyoung when he realizes what’s happening. “I can’t be summa cum laude if I haven’t graduated yet, Soon-ah.” He smiles despite everything, soft and facing the tiled floor beneath him. “Plus, I’d only be magna cum laude.”

“Same difference, nerd.” Soonyoung chides. He leads them towards the main gym because he knows there aren’t any cameras there or immediately outside. “Anyways, let’s get outta here.”

“We’re skipping?” Soonyoung nods. “Where are we going?”

“Home? Or we could go out. Up to you. My sister’s home this week, so I have her car.”

“Home sounds good.” Soonyoung agrees silently, flashing him the widest, proudest grin. He pushes the gym door open with his side, digging in his pocket for his sister’s car keys.

(That grin—Wonwoo doesn’t think much of it. In fact, he doesn’t think anything about it at all, since it’s something he’s seen a handful of times before. It’s just that he doesn’t know he’s going to be seeing it, feeling suffocated by it for a hefty fraction of his life, this blindingly bright thing that comes in wavering flecks like the sun reflected off a fresh puddle. He feels it before he sees it but sees it hundreds of thousands of times before he actually feels anything as a response.)

Soonyoung isn’t a great driver because he turns the music up too loud, gets too into singing the songs on the radio. The top 40’s aren’t Wonwoo’s thing unless he’s with Soonyoung, which is something he does think about. Maybe at the time being he’s just happy he’s gotten close to him, but in the long run, maybe he’ll realize that sights like this are the reason he became so attached to him in the first place. He really has no idea what he’s gotten himself into—Wonwoo just wishes someone had told him how easy it is to fall in love with someone, especially when that person is Kwon Soonyoung.

 

                _ten; dots_

There’s a tiny box of pushpins beside the corkboard map Wonwoo hung up in their apartment. They intend to stick them into the places they go together. They don’t necessarily have world travel kind of money, but with enough saving, Soonyoung can open it and push a few into the map—Kyoto, Nagoya, Tokyo. If Wonwoo thought he smiled broadly then, he had no idea what was in store when he walked down a street of cherry blossom trees beside Soonyoung, shoulders close to touching. It’s a bit cold for spring, but Wonwoo knows the flush on his cheeks isn’t from the weather and the watering in his eyes isn’t from the dryness.

It’s their last night when Wonwoo digs into his suitcase to pull out another tiny box, this one a flocked velvet rather than a clear plastic. It’s also not filled with pushpins—rather, a silver ring, thin and with two small diamonds inset in the band. He didn’t expect to feel nervous at all, considering this has been a concept since they were eighteen years old. He knows Soonyoung will say yes, but somehow six or so years of anticipation has made Wonwoo antsy.

Soonyoung is half asleep on the futon, waiting for Wonwoo to join him. They’re staying in an old-fashioned little inn, a garden visible just outside their window, paper screen doors on either side of the room they’ve laid their beds on. Wonwoo pulls the ring from its box and wanders over to Soonyoung, sitting beside him and nudging his side with his foot.

“Can you sit up for a minute, Soon-ah?” He asks quietly, pushing Soonyoung’s hair back with his free hand.

Soonyoung groans. “Why?”

“Because.”

“Wonwoo-yah, I’m tired.” That’s fair—Wonwoo hadn’t thought about how much walking they did that day.

“Please? I have a present for you.”

The ring is balled up in his fist, so tightly that he can see his knuckles turning white. At this point, he’s visibly trembling, swallowing hard and using a shaky hand to pull Soonyoung closer to him. Soonyoung ends up sitting with a leg on either side of Wonwoo, close to him but not too close, just enough so they don’t go cross-eyed trying to look at each other. The lamp is behind Soonyoung, so there’s this soft ring of warm light outlining his bedhead and mussed up yukata. Wonwoo could cry.

“So,” Wonwoo starts, “I love you.” Soonyoung mouths the words back at him, eye contact making Wonwoo shudder. “You’re my best friend, and—”

“Don’t get cheesy on me, Wonwoo-yah.” He laughs softly, suddenly bowing his head in embarrassment.

“Okay.” Wonwoo says dumbly. He reveals the ring in his palm while Soonyoung’s head is still down. “Then, will you marry me?”

He’s looking back and forth between Wonwoo’s eyes and his open palm, completely in awe and laughing in tiny bursts. “Wait,” He says with a sharp inhale, like he’s about to cry, “I—oh my God, did you really—” Soonyoung forces his hand to close around the band again. “Stop. Go back to being cheesy. You’re not seriously doing this.”

“No takesies backsies, Soon-ah.” He tells him. He cradles Soonyoung’s hand in his, holding his ring finger and hesitating before sliding the ring on. “Please say yes so I can put this on?”

Soonyoung manages a nod before sobbing grossly and loudly, collapsing into Wonwoo’s chest the second the ring is around his finger. Wonwoo isn’t nervous anymore, but he’s still sweaty, shaking slightly while he rubs Soonyoung’s back in a desperate attempt to quiet him down.

The ambient sounds of the inn are peaceful and blanket Soonyoung’s sobs, crickets chirping and water running down rocks outside. Wonwoo thinks he’ll never be able to associate those songs with anything but love, more specifically loving Soonyoung, who happens to be a culmination of every problem he’s ever had twisted into the solution to said problems. He wouldn’t have it any other way, though—again, because of love.

Love can manifest itself in many different things. Dots, for instance, as in the dots left on their wall map from the pushpins, dots as in the moles on Soonyoung’s neck and shoulders that Wonwoo draws together with kisses, dots as in the stones accenting Soonyoung’s ring finger, dots as in unrelated occurrences and happenings that string themselves together into lines to mean something more—lines that go on forever.

**Author's Note:**

> UPDATE: this fic is on an indefinite hiatus! i'm not sure if i'll ever get around to writing lines. i have so many other fic ideas that i like more than what i had planned for lines, so please anticipate those! thank you so much for all the love!


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